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"Just about every page is filled with the spawn of a delightfully mad dreamer." - INNSMOUTH FREE PRESS
"A bizarro fever-dream tale of vampire lovers attempting to summon a hamburger and LOLCat-obsessed Cthulhu to destroy their doomed undersea kingdom. Including a Necronomicon that is really a unicorn coloring book, Cthulhu Comes to the Vampire Kingdom is sure to annoy Lovecraftian purists, but made me laugh out loud at many turns." - ROSS E. LOCKHART, editor of The Book of Cthulhu
"What you'd get if H. P. Lovecraft wrote a Tim Burton animated film." - CARLTON MELLICK III, author of The Faggiest Vampire
Franz and Lola are vampires in love. They live in a cottage near the sea with their little vampire baby.
Burn Girl is a lonely girl who walks along the bottom of the sea, constantly on fire. The water doesn't put her fire out or soothe her burns. It only makes her feel like she's wearing an itchy wool sweater.
Bruno is the buffest vampire. He is building Muscle Island, a floating fortress comprised of mussels.
The Vampire Science Council has been working for centuries to prevent the depletion of their arctic planet's blood supply, but the blood has finally run out.
Cyrus Lugosi's friends want to slaughter him as part of a ritual sacrifice that will raise Cthulhu from his tomb at the bottom of the sea. There are just two problems: The closest thing to the Necronomicon they've got is a unicorn coloring book, and Cthulhu is more interested in his quest for the perfect hamburger.
Their fates will converge when Cthulhu Comes to the Vampire Kingdom.