Meet Chuck Lambert, who, though not exactly a fool, is guilty of letting his imagination get the best of his wits. That's because our young, naive Lambert wants his own planet. But rather than purchase one legally from the Interior Department of the Outer Galactic Control, he soon succumbs to the flashy advertising of an unsavory galactic swindler named Madman Murphy & the purported King of Planetary Realtors. What Madman is the king of, is selling the unwary a planet that isn't quite right, a planet where one can't sit down because there's something the matter with its matter. And that's exactly what becomes the matter for our unlucky voyager, after Chuck toils for eleven grueling years to scrape together enough money to finally buy a planet of his own.