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  • Penelope Bloom
  • I Bite She Sucks

I Bite She SucksA Paranormal Werewolf Romantic Comedy

by Penelope Bloom
I Bite She Sucks: A Paranormal Werewolf Romantic Comedy by Penelope Bloom
Unrated

I threw a paper airplane love note from my window.
First mistake.
I aimed it at a gorgeous stranger and put my address on it.
Second mistake.
Yep. You guessed it. I missed and hit a werewolf instead.
Best thing that ever happened to me?

Next thing I knew, a large angrily attractive werewolf man was trying to get in my apartment. I introduced him to my baseball bat and figured that was the end of things.

Or not.

Because my well-meaning sister became a vampire to cure my immune disorder.

Long story. In the process, she got a deadly team of fang bangers to hunt us for breaking their rules. Longer story. A+ for good intentions and a D- for execution, if you ask me.

Re-enter Mr. Grumpy and Growly werewolf. He’s going to be my bodyguard slash kidnapper, whether I like it or not. Apparently, he’s the only thing standing between me and certain death.

Swoon, right?

Of course he hates all things vampire. A.K.A. he will take me from undead to dead-dead if he figures out what I’m becoming.

Thankfully, he has completely underestimated my ability to woo him with my adorable innocence, cheery disposition, and extreme powers of modesty.

As long as the feelings stay one-sided, I’ll be fine. Because giving your heart to a guy who is probably going to try to murder you is a recipe for disaster. And come on. When was the last time I made a catastrophic, life-threatening mistake?

Amazon: Check Best Offer

FantasyRomanceParanormal RomanceUrban FantasyParanormal FantasyVampiresHumorWerewolves
Release date: April 17, 2021

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Penelope Bloom

Penelope Bloom doesn’t just write romantic comedy; she flips it on its head with sharp wit, fearless characters, and situations that teeter between wildly outrageous and strikingly relatable. Her books don’t tiptoe into the absurd; they leap, heels first, into laugh-out-loud chaos built on irresistible chemistry and unexpected tenderness.

Best known for cheeky, bestselling titles like His Banana, Her Cherry, and His Treat, Bloom has carved out a space in the rom-com world where humor and heat collide. Readers flock to her stories for more than just steamy scenes and punchy one-liners. At the core of each book is a heartbeat that reminds readers love doesn’t always arrive with a bow; sometimes, it shows up with a bad attitude, a banana in hand, and a perfectly timed pun.

Read more ...

Her writing style walks the line between satire and sincerity. Beneath the bold covers and eyebrow-raising titles is a keen understanding of modern romance and the ridiculous ways people try to avoid falling in love. Her heroines are smart, sarcastic, and never afraid to go after what they want, while her heroes often find themselves knocked off balance in the most delightful ways.

Though she keeps a relatively low profile outside the pages of her books, Bloom has cultivated a fiercely loyal readership. Her novels regularly climb Amazon’s romance charts, and her signature brand of humor has made her a recognizable name in contemporary romantic comedy.

Writing, for Penelope Bloom, is both an escape and a rebellion against taking life too seriously. She invites readers to laugh at the mess, swoon at the tension, and maybe even blush a little along the way.

More books by Penelope Bloom

Confluence Academy Book 3 (Confluence Academy #3)
⧗ 8.00 / 1
Unveiled (Confluence Academy #2)
⧗ 9.34 / 3
Unbound (Confluence Academy #1)
Unrated
Kiss Kiss Fang Fang: A Sucky Vampire Romantic Comedy
Unrated


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