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  • Punk Land

Punk Land

by Carlton Mellick III
Punk Land by Carlton Mellick III
Unrated

A sequel to Satan Burger.

A completely retarded tribute to Kurt Vonnegut's BREAKFAST OF CHAMPIONS, for punks.

There are many different places you can go to after you die. One such place is PUNK LAND, the punk version of Heaven. It is an anarchist's utopia of independence and individuality, where the parties are wild and the music is fierce, where everyone is allowed to be whoever they want to be... or, at least, that's how it was in the beginning. Now, something is different about Punk Land. It doesn't seem to be the same place anymore. Perhaps it's the new punk handbook that everyone must follow, which explains what is punk and what isn't. Or maybe it's the introduction of the punk point system, where every citizen must retain a certain number of punk points or lose their citizenship. It could be the organization of the Punk Police, which enforces punk behavior and mohawk size. Or there might just be something wrong with the Punk Council, the new corporate government of Punk land. Either way, Punk Land just doesn't seem to be very punk anymore...

The story follows Goblin, a deformed young hermit with a meat-mohawk who is perfectly happy haunting an abandoned gatehouse far outside of civilization with his pet dildo, Frog Strips, until two strangers named Nan and Mortician arrive at his doorstep with a crazy story that turns his quiet post-life existence upside-down. Goblin soon finds himself mixed up in a war between corporate punks and traditional punks that he really couldn't care less about. But without the help of Goblin, Mortician's sperm, and a blue-mohawked female assassin named Shark Girl, the utopian anarchy in Punk Land will surely be lost.

Featuring cameos by famous punk icons, such as GG Allin, Johnny Rotten, and Anal Cunt singer Seth Putnam (who, of course, thinks this book is totally gay), with cartoonish illustrations in the tradition of Kurt Vonnegut's "Breakfast of Champions." This vision of an absurd punk rock afterlife is Carlton Mellick III's most fun and hilarious book to date.

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Science FictionBizarro Fiction
Release date: 2005

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Carlton Mellick III

Carlton Mellick III

Carlton Mellick III (born 1977) is an American author currently residing in Portland, Oregon. He is best known as one of the leading authors in the 'Bizarro' movement in underground literature.

Mellick's work has been described as a combination of trashy schlock sci-fi/horror and postmodern literary art. His novels explore surreal versions of earth in contemporary society and imagined futures, commonly focusing on social absurdities and satire.

More books by Carlton Mellick III

ClownFellas: Tales of the Bozo Family
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As She Stabbed Me Gently in the Face
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Sweet Story
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The Tick People
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Hungry Bug
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Cuddly Holocaust
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Hammer Wives
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Village of the Mermaids
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Clusterfuck
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Quicksand House
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Tumor Fruit
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Ugly Heaven
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The Handsome Squirm
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Armadillo Fists
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Crab Town
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Barbarian Beast Bitches of the Badlands
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I Knocked Up Satan's Daughter
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The Morbidly Obese Ninja
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Fantastic Orgy
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Zombies and Shit
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The Kobold Wizard's Dildo of Enlightenment +2
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The Cannibals of Candyland
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The Faggiest Vampire
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Warrior Wolf Women of the Wasteland
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Ultra Fuckers
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Cybernetrix
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Adolf in Wonderland
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Apeshit
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The Egg Man
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Sausagey Santa
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Ugly Heaven, Beautiful Hell (Hades)
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Sex and Death in Television Town
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The Haunted Vagina
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Sea of the Patchwork Cats
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War Slut
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The Menstruating Mall
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Ocean of Lard
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Fishy-Fleshed
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The Baby Jesus Butt Plug
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Teeth and Tongue Landscape
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Angel Scene / Teeth and Tongue Landscape
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The Steel Breakfast Era
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Razor Wire Pubic Hair
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Electric Jesus Corpse
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Satan Burger
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Sunset with a Beard
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